WemonAde.com When Life Gives You…

I can’t vouch for any other country, but in America, intimate love is not easy to come by.

With the generations, technology, and “equality” in place, love has seemed to take a back seat to personal fulfillment.  Because of this, people don’t seem to give love the chance we once did when we didn’t have so many choices.  Before the 60’s, people worked harder, had less choices and stuck together when times got tough.  Nowadays, if love gets hard, if the relationship isn’t easy, people are more apt to give up and go try to find happiness in other ways. 

It seems that people are finding love at a later age, when they’ve seen that personal happiness…includes loving someone intimately.  Biologically, humans are supposed to pair up.  The current dates and times don’t dictate to the pairing.  An individual can find everything (sans a loving, intimate relationship) on their own.  Therefore, people put off love, making that last on the list because the American Dream is capitalistic, which is a winner for the individual, but not for the people as a whole. 

On a personal note, I came to realize this at almost 40, realizing that I would  spend my life alone if I didn’t open the door to wanting love and having the willingness to do what it takes to get there.  That decision was life transforming for me, changing deep seeded views on what love was all about.  I thought that it should be easy peasy, but it’s an investment, meaning you can’t have all the stuff you did as a single person. 

I’m not saying love is HARD, but you need to be willing to put in some effort to get to that goal, because nowadays, people can so easily have other choices.  But, then, why are there so many lonely people in this world and why is internet dating on the rise?  I think it’s because people are looking for love, but don’t have the wherewithal to know how to get there. 

That’s why love is a work in progress.  To get to love intimately, it means a very personal choice is made that you are willing to put in effort when things are tough, to let go when you least want to and to be willing to put your heart out there when it’s looking like you may be rejected.  But it is SO worth it.

As LAO TSU once said:  “Being deeply loved by someone gives you strength.  Loving someone deeply gives you courage”.